Work Energy, Love Energy

Sometimes people come to me for a reading,  and their work cards are all great - bright and glowing,  with energy and movement.  But their love cards are stagnant, with no flow there at all. So I say,  work is easy right now, put your energy there and you will get quick rewards.  Maybe you should ease off looking for love and focus on your work.  

One of my clients said to me,  you've been saying that for three years.  Really?  I checked my notes and she was right,  her work cards are always Aces,  connecting, networking,  getting promoted,  all of that comes effortlessly to her. But love doesn't.  So I said to her,  what are you doing at work,  that you aren't doing in relationships?  And without hesitating she said,  "I know my value at work."  But with people,  with men,  she was not as confident. 

So we spent the session talking about transferring some of that confident self knowledge from work,  and putting it more into play with dating.  She can instantly recognize if a project has potential, needs nursing,  needs to be scrapped. Can she do that analysis on every 3rd date?  Maybe she is rejecting too soon,  or nursing the connection along too much,  or not scrapping it when it is clearly going nowhere. But if she gives herself this task,  go on three plus dates with anyone,  then do an analysis, and see if that gets her more of what she wants. She thought that was an interesting idea.  We'll have to wait and see if the cards get warmer once she starts doing this.

Love. Part 2

There is so much to say about love!  

Here's Part Two

Before love,  there is the quest for love.   Dating is such a complex and strange experience,  many people come to the tarot, to help sort it out.   People misbehave,  over-commit,  self-destruct,  straight out lie,  and then,  sometimes,  rarely,  but once is enough - prove themselves and are worthy and give the relationship time and attention and it all grows from there.  

But how do you know which one it's going to be? It's a real 7 of cups time.

The cards are often brutal about dating.  If they don't think it will work, they just say it.  I remember doing a reading and a girl asked about her boyfriend and drew the Devil Card.  She and I both looked at that clear message,  and I said,  "Oh,  honey,  it's not good."  and she nodded sadly and told me he was unfaithful to her and worked as a drug dealer.   Well,  clearly that was not what she wanted and the rest of the conversation was about why she was letting such a difficult relationship into her life. I didn't know him (or her,  it was her first reading with me) but the cards knew straight away! 

Other times the cards are more hopeful.  A young woman in her 30's came to ask about her boyfriend who was out of work and appeared to be happy to let her carry the load for a while.   She was getting anxious (as anyone would be) but the cards were surprisingly calm.  He was moving from the King of Cups to the King of Pentacles - from the boyfriend to the husband card and I told her to hang in there.   When she came and saw me about another issue (work this time) a year or so later,  it had all worked out,  he was in a better job and they were planning a wedding...   

So if you want to explore dating relationships,  tarot can definitely help! 

Flirting with New York

Often people come to me, knowing that the old relationship is over, but still entangled with that person, and ask me if they should date other people.  The cards often tell them that they need a break, to give them time to adjust to their new situation - they draw the 4 swords or the hermit.   

But doing nothing is hard: you feel empty, you want some action to fill the void.  So I tell them to go and flirt with New York. This is an amazing city, but it’s also a tough one.  If we don’t take advantage of all the marvelous things that go on here, we are paying the price of living here – huge cost of living, crowds, lack of personal and psychic space – without taking the benefits.  

 

So I tell them go out with humans (as opposed to dating) old friends, new friends, potential friends, and flirt with New York. Find music, lectures, theatre, and museums.  It doesn’t have to be intellectual, go to new restaurants, comedy shows, and find the best Bloody Mary in the city or the perfect brunch place. Go play tennis,  cycle,  improve your one mile time.   Flirt with the city and that will help let the old feelings go and give space for new relationships to start.