New Ways to see things…

Every so often I hear something from my clients which just clicks for me, and a new piece of knowledge falls into place. Recently I had two such experiences.

  I always have difficulty with the phone, I know people would love it if I did phone readings, but I get nothing from the phone, it just doesn’t work for me at all - I really need you to shuffle the cards… But a client who works as a life coach explained like this – talking on the phone and not seeing each other is like sitting next to each other on a long night drive; it gives a cocoon of intimacy that you might not get if you were sitting face to face.  What a beautiful description!  I still can’t do phone work but I feel much more comfortable with the idea of it.

The second client listened to the talk I give before every reading, of while the cards indicate the path you are on, they can be changed, but it takes extra focus, effort and concentration; if you continue doing what you are doing, then the outcome card is where you will end up. And she said,  like you are on the A train,  and if you keep on it,  the last stop is inevitable and if you want to get off, you have to figure out which subway gets you the direction you want and how to transfer -  requiring much more thought and effort.  And I looked her and said that’s exactly right!

I love it when I get new metaphors!

Woman sitting on Subway chair is by George Segal

Recording the readings

I always permit people to record the reading. I’m so old, that I used to record readings on those awful cassettes, that looped out or tore, or we forgot to turn over, or the player didn’t work… I’m so grateful for smart phones!  I also tell people that my fantasy is that no one ever listens to the recordings, but it can help people settle and focus during the reading.  However the other day I did a reading and got this very sweet note afterwards – 

As I was leaving the cafe, I decided to listen to the recording and I realized that my questions were in fact answered but I just didn't get the answers that I wanted to hear.  Replaying the recording brings an unexpected sense of comfort… I really do appreciate you for being completely honest with me and not giving me false hope. 

And when I asked her if I could quote her she replied I think everyone who has the reading with you should bring a recorder.  Having it made my session so much more valuable- as I was able to replay some of the most profound points you made and ponder accordingly. I'll always have it to use as a guide and a confidence booster of sorts when I need the comfort and guidance.

I love that the readings can give comfort and clarity long after they have been given… so please, bring your phone or recording device…

Pretty pictures by Lauren Alexander

Ritual of Burning

I hate to sound too new age, but sometimes we are just energetically entangled with someone or something and they are not giving us any energy back.  I’ve seen people who are energetically entwined with someone who is dead (e.g. - the person who is still furious and reacting against a parent who has passed).

I often read for people who are energetically entangled with a relationship that did not work.  The other person has moved on, may even be living with someone else, but the person in front of me just can’t seem to let them go.

So I suggest the Ritual of Burning.

Go and buy some expensive, beautiful paper – plain lined paper is not good enough.  Buy lots of it, 50 sheets at least, so you don’t have to have any anxiety that you might run out.  Then one day, when the apartment is quiet, turn off your phone, shut down the computer, take a sheet of that beautiful paper and start to write.  Write everything, good or bad that you have thought about that person – how much loved them, how much you hate them, your sorrow, your bad wishes, everything, without restraint.  Write until you’ve feel you’ve said it all, until your hand starts to cramp.  It’s okay to cry while you write. 

After you feel you’ve written enough - and this is really important,  you don’t want to keep that paper alive in your house -  you then put that paper in a fire proof dish and you set fire to it,  and watch it burn,  watch the words curl up and turn to ash,  watch the energy go up into the air.

You can do this as many times as you like – every night for weeks if need be (no one ever does that, but you have permission, if you want.) There is something about having that torrent of feeling/energy leaving you, going on to the containment of the page, and then being burnt, turning to smoke and ash, that just lets some of that energy go.

There will come a time when you just don’t feel like doing it anymore, where the need is not so intense… and that means you are not so energetically entwined with that person anymore.  Now you have space for someone new to enter your life…

The Universe Hates Me

A while ago I did a reading for a young man who was clearly angry.  As he spoke about his frustrations at work, and how the corporate structure felt like it was strangling him, he burst out and said ‘I think God hates me.’  I looked at him surprised. ‘Okay, not God, but I think the universe hates me.’ 

‘Why do you think that?’  I asked.

‘Because every day at work, it feels like I am pushing against this enormous wind. Every day is so hard.’

And I said straight away, without even thinking, ‘I think you are wrong.  I think God loves you;  I think you are walking in the wrong direction.’

It was so clear to me that he was temperamentally unsuited to his corporate job, and would have been far happier to take some risks, be entrepreneurial and work for himself.  When we talked about it further he said he felt so relieved and happy, and that he would go and look for other options.

Sometimes we chose a path, because it’s safe, or highly coveted, or everyone is doing it... But if the universe it pushing against us so strongly, it’s worth asking if we are going in the right direction,  and perhaps there is another path that would suit us better.