Love is always the answer

I just had to note this auspicious day - where all relationships are recognized before the law,  and given rights and dignity.  

It's amazing how far we've come in a relatively short time and I'm so happy for everyone,  for my friends and family who are now allowed to get married and allow themselves and their families all the protections that that entails.

Love wins. We all win.

Driving in the Right Direction

I’ve been in New York nearly 14 years, but like a true New Yorker,  I don’t have a car.  If we need one,  we hire one and that only happens two to three times a year.  So I’ve been driving on my Australian driver’s license all this time.  

My son turned 17 recently and when we encouraged him to get his learner’s permit, I went along too.  I was told that the DMV could be an unfriendly place, but the staff there were so delighted that I was doing the test alongside my son that were smiles and lots of conversation.  Then we had to watch that weird 5 hours of video, and finally he could take lessons.  He passed his driver’s test a few weeks ago, feeling very happy with himself.  

Yesterday it was my turn.  I’ve been driving for 30 years but tests still make me feel judged (as they should, I was being judged!) which is an uncomfortable and challenging feeling.  I am very happy to have passed first time (it would have been so embarrassing if I hadn’t!) and soon I will have my own shiny New York driver’s license. 

I think it’s really valuable to do things that take you out of your comfort zone, that stretch you a little.  It’s easy to fall into the rut of doing what you are good at, and you are good at many things, but then you realize there are certain things you just avoid.  I’m pleased that I decided to do this along with my son, and that I have a real sense of accomplishment for this week. 

Now on to next week’s challenge… 





Cute Lego pix from the Lego Travellers Facebook page - where an enterprising couple took pictures all over Australia - and other parts of the world - using lego figures.

When do you give up on the dream?

Sometimes people come to me with a big dream, they want an extraordinary life, they want fame and fortune.  And why shouldn’t they? These are the golden benchmarks of our culture.  But the dream is not unfolding in the way they would like; there are frustrations and serious setbacks. 

I am very pragmatic when it comes to this and ask hard questions, but I really trust the cards, because they are often very explicit in these situations.   I spoke to a charming girl in her 20’s and the cards just said no, she is not going to pay the rent with art, and I spoke gently about alternatives,  keeping painting but looking for something else to sustain her till her portfolio builds.  She was not happy with this reading,  but I have to say what I see in the cards,  otherwise,  what is the point of coming to see me?

I read for a bubbly 38 year old and the cards were consistently positive about her desire to act, and I said keep trying.  Of course, sometimes you are ready to hear bad news; sometimes the break really is just around the corner.  What we really want to know is if we are on the right path,  learning the lessons we need to learn.

Ten thousand steps

You know those ads you see which tell you that you can have this body is 6 weeks?  Yeah, that never worked for me either. 

About two years ago I got my first fitbit.  I’ve always struggled with fitness (and weight,  but that’s another issue) and though I live in NYC and walk everywhere,  once I put the fitbit on,  I saw that I was walking less than I thought.  I was averaging about 6,000 steps a day, whereas current wisdom is 10,000 steps for maintenance, 12,000 steps for weight loss.   So I wore it for a couple of months, and some days made 10,000 but I don’t think I made 70,000 a week once for that first year.  I lost it when I was shopping, trying on clothes, and it took me about 3 months to replace.

But I like the fitbit,  I like the calm relentlessness of the numbers,  you can’t cajole or argue with it,  you either met goal or you didn’t.  So I bought another one.  That one I killed by accidentally putting it in the washing machine.  That took about 2 months to replace.

After a year or so, I realized I was actually walking more.  I was doing 10,000 or close most days,  and it was less of a struggle to do so.  I still didn’t always make 70,000 a week,  but I was in the 60’s most weeks,  occasionally hitting goal.  When the new puppy ate my last fitbit,  I looked up on ebay (I was sick of paying full amount) and bought one the next day.  I wear it all the time now, and this year,  maybe 2 years in,  I average 12,000 steps a day,  definitely make 70,000 steps a week.

I’m not telling you this to gloat, but to say that a journey of a thousand steps starts with the first one.  My first year was far from stellar, the graph is definitely not a clear progression, lots of loops and pauses there.  It’s an incremental journey, but one that you can absolutely see results from a few years down the track…

Transfering energy

So I was a bit grumpy when went to the gym today and met with a substitute teacher with the most beautiful smile,  named Sandra. She made us bop and dance through some excellent music (we both agreed afterwards that the music is everything,  even good steps/workout with bad music just doesn't work)  but really it was her energy infusing the room. 

I felt like an energy vampire,  seeing her joyous vibrant energy and taking it into me. Afterwards I made that passing comment to another woman and she said that she felt exactly the same thing!  So we are good vampires,  taking energy from those who have it to share,  and letting it lift us up... 

I can do the same at some readings - share my energy with them,  lifting them up.  In a good reading,  the energy exchange is mutual,  and we both walk out energized and optimistic.