Remember the Golden Rule

Recently,  in  quite a few of my readings,  people have complained about how unreliable other people are becoming.  Not necessarily just on dates,  but also friends, family, adult children - everyone seems to be hedging their options, saying yes and changing it to maybe,  or just ghosting arrangements. 

Covid has had many strange after affects, and NYC was always a city scared to commit,  incase something better came along,  but hey,  let's all try to remember the golden rule - treat others as we would like to be treated ourselves. 

I know,  I know,  life is complex,  and we want to do something and say yes and something weird happens and we can't.  But we should immediately tell people that we can't,  and we should look at our lives if weird things are happening too often. Maybe we are overwhelmed,  maybe we are over committing.  Maybe we should have a quiet weekend and do nothing.   Nothing wrong with saying "I'd love to,  but I can't." 

And if everyone is flaking on you,  then stop making plans with them!  One woman said then she would never see her friends,  if she didn't make the plans,  and then we both stopped and looked at each other.  So you make all the plans and they flake 50% of the time?  Maybe let them go a while and see if they reach out,  I suggested softly.  And if they never reach out... well what are you willing to tolerate to keep them in your life?  Not this,  she said..

And that's the second Golden Rule.  People will treat you like you let them.  If they treat you badly,  and you stop letting them,  and they are no longer in your life,  well,  that's your answer.