I like Nerve Magazine, (not just because they did a small piece on me once )
I was reading them recently and they had a terrific interview with Ira Glass, and he said something so interesting, that I really believe, about infidelity:
“For example, before
people begin an affair, before they cheat, the real transition begins when they
confide in someone else. That’s where the betrayal begins…And as soon as he
starts having truths that he doesn’t tell to her but that he tells to someone
else…that’s the beginning of the end for them.”
I see this all the
time in the stories people tell me. When you are confiding more to your friends
than to your lover/spouse, if you are being more intimate with others than with
them, that’s when trouble starts. It’s
not that you can’t be intimate with other people, it’s just that you can’t have
stories you withhold from your lover but share with others, especially others
you find attractive; that is a tiny crack between the two of you, which can easily grow if
you put enough pressure on it.
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