Weak Ties

I read an article in the New York Times about how becoming a regular at a café can help lessen a sense of isolation.  When I first moved to New York,  I knew my husband, who was working 60-80 hours a week,  and my son, who was 4 years old.  It was just after 9/11 and the streets of Tribeca were relatively empty at the time.  I tramped all over them with my 4 year old in tow,  getting to know the faces that I passed regularly.  One day I walked by a restaurant I hadn't ever been to,  and the workers there wanted to know where my son was,  they were used to seeing the two of us together.  A small interaction like that can make you feel so happy,  so much more connected.   

I became very active in my son's school and was often speaking to large groups of parents,  so when I walked the streets of Tribeca people often smiled or stopped for a quick chat.  It made one of the busiest cities in the world feel like a warm and friendly village to me,  and that definitely helped! 

Though these connections are not strong or essential,  so sociologists call them 'weak ties', they are still very important.  When the guy at the counter knows your order,  when the florist smiles at you and says you always love the gardenias,  when the small conversations anchor you,  let them!  And notice the small interactions people have with you,  so you can be part of their web too.