When someone asks you to do something for them, ask yourself these three questions:
Can I do it?
Am I willing to do it?
Will I feel resentment if I do it?
I think these questions are so important. There are things I can't do, things I can do but am not willing to do, things that just make me feel resentful. If I feel resentful or not willing, is the outcome worth it?
Recently I did a complicated government form application, which relied on me having done several other simpler government form things earlier in the year. I had to do it, there was no one else who could do it for me. So I broke it into the smallest possible tasks and started with them. As things grew more complex, at least I had all the simple stuff done and accurate. It took me over 6 months, and then it was done. I did feel exhausted and resentful during the process, but then afterwards, I felt overwhelmingly grateful that it was done, done well, done successfully.
Sometimes people ask for help and I have to say, I'm so sorry, I just don't have the bandwidth for that now. Sometimes people ask for help, and I say, sure, let's do it now. But I do ask myself these three questions. And if I will feel resentment, I ask myself what other options do I have? Can I deal with this feeling? Is the end result worth it? If it's not, then don't do it!
All images from the wonderful This Might Hurt Tarot Deck by Isabella Rothman