Good days and Bad days

So I've been having good days and bad days.  Good days I genuinely count my blessings of which there are plenty.  But the bad days - they creep up. For five days I needed to buy groceries and couldn't make myself leave the house.   I actually opened the shelf long life milk I had bought early in the pandemic  to tide us over.  (It's weirdly creamy)  

And then,  yesterday,  I got out of bed,  did 3 loads of washing and went shopping for food. There is now milk and eggs in the fridge.  And to my huge relief,  the supermarkets in Sydney are edging back towards normal.  The price of fresh produce has gone up enormously - but that's because of the bush fires late last year impacting us. One thing this year has brought home to me is how connected we are to the land,  and how when we lose connection,  when we disregard the land,  that's when devastation can arise.

So if you are having a bad day,  be kind to yourself,  and if you are having a good day,  do your washing.  I am still writing lists, as I find myself more forgetful than usual,  when the fog as I call it, comes and sits on my head.  

But yesterday I played scrabble with a friend (appropriately socially distanced)  and life felt more ordinary and thus so much better (and she put down an 8 letter word! Hamsters!  84 points!!) 

Keeping yourself well

In these difficult times,  it's easy to get agitated and upset.  I've found myself feeling claustrophobic. My own irritation/anxiety levels were rising and deep breathing and chocolate were not enough to bring them down.   I've put on 4 pounds in two weeks.  Always a bad sign!

So I've made a more concerted effort to connect with friends,  both of us drinking coffee and chatting over zoom or skype or facetime.  So many options! 

My gym closed two weeks ago today and I hadn't done any exercise other than walk the dog since then.  I always say in my readings that feelings are energy,  and if you are angry or irritated or worried,  that's also energy.  If you can't defuse it at the source (you can't always shout at your boss/mother/lover/financial worries/ pandemic) you should still try to get rid of it.  I suggest high energy exercise - kick boxing,  running,  zumba.  I can't kick box or run to save my life (or my knees) but I can dance.

So today I went through the internet and found that to create a good zumba class is no simple matter.   There were lots of them that just didn't work for me - too hard,  too easy,  too complicated,  didn't like the music. It's easy to give up.   But after half an hour and a few missteps,  I found a great zumba teacher that I really liked - Ines Araonos.   



So this morning is already better.  I'm sweaty and bouncy and can feel that irritated edgy feeling relax .   I think tomorrow I'll do a barre class.