Let yourself grow before falling in love

So often we look to love to rescue us,  but I do a lot of readings for younger women - just out of college,  just starting their twenties and I tell them that they are still growing and learning about themselves.  

I really wish younger women wouldn't throw so much of themselves into relationships,  and focus more on having a clear relationship with themselves.  And I have to say,  college graduates today are really more self aware than they were 20 years ago. 

People still want relationships,  but not at the cost of their friendships, their career paths,  their own life choices.  And that is as it should be.  You need to know yourself before you become part of pair.  Before you are 25,  no man should be more important to you than the relationship you are building within yourself.  

Do the work on you,  be clear on what you can or can't give,  what you will or won't accept,  and then the Lovers card can appear. 

Bad energy weeks

Some weeks nothing goes right.  Some weeks you always get out on the wrong side of bed,  everything that can go wrong does:  your computer doesn't work and you keep missing the bus.  It's almost like you've caught a bad luck virus.  You start to feel raw and vulnerable.

When this happens to me, I do two things - 1) be kind to myself.  Even if I am part of everything going wrong,  even it was specifically my fault,  I need to be gentle.  Being mean to myself really doesn't help.  And 2) go slow.  Maybe I'm rushing through things,  maybe I'm tripping over my own feet.  Maybe I just need some quiet time to let myself slow down and heal. 

So if you are having a bad week,  know that this sometimes happens,  and it too shall pass.  Be the hanged man,  be kind to yourself and others.  Slow down,  do soft and gentle things.  And the energy will pass.  It always does. 

Cat Tarot cards by Thiago Correa

The Hermit

The hermit is always a tricky card.  Some people really don't like the idea of it - off on your own and introspecting,  a hermit hiding in a cave.  And the Rider Waite image can be a bit off putting

But I try to sway them to it - he's not passively waiting for answers to come to him,  he is actively looking, bringing illumination to dark corners. 

By chance I came across this card - 

And I just love it!  Such a beautiful,  feminine and easy to read version of the Hermit.  There she is, having walked into the woods,  built herself a fire,  and is now finding enlightenment, clarity, power in a very feminine witchy way.  This is the work of Deborah Blake, and her Everyday Witch Tarot

This is why I keep looking for tarot cards.  Sooner or later,  the perfect one that just explains everything for me,  just appears. 

Tarot of Quotes

That Pinterest - aside from me having a new rule of not visiting the site after midnight,  it has given me great pleasure.  There are such a range of Tarot images out there,  that explore and shade the meanings of the cards.
 

I have discovered some new tarot decks there that I hadn’t seen anywhere else.    Tarot of Quotes is from an English tarot card reader who is creating something really beautiful (it’s still a work in progress) I love that the internet lets me access all these amazing thoughts about tarot,  lets people put their own imagery up -  even if it's only one card,  one new image can just tweak your understanding and let it fall into place. 

After a reading we usually decide which cards were the most important and I recommend that you Google the image,  find a version of the card that speaks to you and then put it up in your office or on your computer, to let it keep guiding you.

Going it alone

The Hermit is a very clear card - it means a time for turning inwards, for introspection and quiet solitude. But the hermit portrayed is not sitting on his lonesome, looking for enlightenment. Instead he is out with his lamp, gathering information, analyzing, actively contemplating. The Hermit is about searching for knowledge, being on a quest for enlightenment. Once when a woman asked me if her new relationship was going to work, and the Hermit card came up, We both looked at each other and said, ‘No.’ Sometimes we need to answer questions within before we can reconnect with others.



I really like the inner child variation on the hermit – here we have a Snow White having collapsed after the queen gives her the poisoned apple. One thing the inner child card talks about it wise discrimination. Don’t bite every apple that’s offered. Don’t live in fear, but do think about who is offering you things and why. If a queen is out to get you, then don’t pretend she isn’t. This version encourages you to be more discriminating in your choice of friends and business associates. Give yourself time to think before you act.