Retirement

People often come to me when they have times of transition.  One of the bigger transitions people can have is retirement.  All our lives we've had purpose,  reasons to be get out of bed and do things,  and all of a sudden,  we have choices.  For many of us that is unalloyed pleasure,  but for quite a few of us, that's a new and weird hardship.

I had a woman come to me,  she had been both a hard and smart worker,  she was divorced and wealthy with a really comfortable retirement and a paid off apartment.  But she was drawing the 8 of swords. She felt trapped and unhappy and didn't know why. 

She was tempted to go back to work,  but no one wanted to pay her what she felt was her due,  and she would not work for less.  

So we discussed hobbies and interests and giving it time.  But I also said,  people really need purpose. All her life she had been purposeful.  She had been in real estate,  which is a sharks game in New York City,  and had swum with those sharks!  But now she wasn't and that was pulling her down.  She didn't want to volunteer anywhere,  didn't want to do anything she felt demeaning.  

But then I said,  don't think of it as volunteering,  think of it as mentoring.  There are so many young women starting up in real estate,  who would so value an hour a week with you,  talking through their dilemmas,  listening to you.  You could be of real help to them.  And her face lit up.  Yes,  to be helpful, to feel respected,  to participate.  When framed the right way, she found she could volunteer and have purpose.  

I saw her quite a few years ago, and this year she reached out again,  unexpectedly.  She told me that she had given my name out to many, many people,  and that our reading had changed her whole attitude to retirement and given her a much better outcome than she had expected. 

So let yourself be open to new beginnings,  and to new purposes. 

Life and Purpose

I do readings for people in transition, and one transition is retirement.  I meet people who worked hard all their lives, and have saved enough and have their own homes and come to me and say, why am I drawing the 8 of swords,  what’s going on here, why am I not happy?  And my answer them is that everyone needs a purpose. 

We all need a reason to get out of bed.  If you don’t have a purpose, you start to feel lost and hopeless. Especially goal driven people, who worked so hard to create this retirement, they want to feel respected.   

One woman told me flat out that she would not volunteer, would never ‘work for free’. But she is 72 and can’t find anyone to hire her and does not need the money, so won’t take work she feels beneath her.  She’s unhappily trapped.  Her daughter was so grateful when I said, don’t think of it as working for free - think of it as mentoring.  She had made her money in real estate, and there are many young women, starting out in real estate, who could really benefit from an hour a week with her, talking through their problems, getting her help and advice.  She nodded and said that she could see herself doing that, that felt purposeful, respectful.