5 of wands

I had the funniest exchange the other day.  My client had drawn the 5 of wands,  and I went into my usual description of it - there are people,  clashing with sticks,  but it's sticks, not swords,  so it's like a game of hockey,  and if you sit on the field and huddle,  it's terrifying but if you step up and grab and stick and play,  then it's just a game. 

And she said,  a field?  Hockey's on ice.  And then we had to have a cultural exchange.  As an Australian,  we played field hockey at school.  We had these long curved sticks and ran.  Ice hockey was a derivative of field hockey.  She wasn't sure about that,  and we looked it up on our phones.

"Well, I'll be," she said. "you learn something new every day!"

Better than human?

I had time to spare (better than time to kill) and randomly watched a TV show that I had no knowledge of - Dark Net,  episode one,  Crush.  It was about the influence of the internet on relationships, something that interests me greatly.

I was so struck by the one about Rinko,  the Japanese girl on Love Plus,  a dating game. It's a really basic AI, no where nearly as good as the one depicted on the movie Her.  But what happens is the same - the lonely man forms a relationship with the game that is far more important to him than any relationship he has IRL (in real life)  and starts to prevent him forming any potential relationship with a real life woman.  Why? Well, because humans are complex and difficult and require compromise. They aren't always available or receptive or interested.  Rinko is always there,  you have complete control in the relationship - switch it on, there she is, interested and pleased to see you,  switch it off and there she goes,  no complaints or needs of her own.  

It saddened me to see this boy chide his mother for delicately saying she hopes he meets a real girl sometime.  "Don't talk like that,  Rinko doesn't like it."  Of course games are easier than humans,  but these men are finding games more rewarding than humans - better to be in the fantasy world of Rinko's love than in the frustrating world of dating. 

I think humans are tricky - with opinions and actions that you don't always expect or like. The other story in the episode had a terrible tale of revenge porn that was genuinely frightening.  But still,  this stepping back into a fantasy world with a programmed AI did not feel like a solution,  but like another kind of problem. Intimacy takes work and risk,  but connection is part of our humanity and needs to be fostered.